Thursday 24 May 2012

Dealing with the Wanties


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I have an illness.   It’s called 'the wanties'.  I don’t think it is hereditary but I am fairly sure that it’s contagious.  I seem to catch it from my Mum, my sister, my friends and my bloddies.  Admittedly some days it is worse than others but it’s always there - an illness that I will have to deal with for the rest of my life.  I think I am beyond cure now but I have found ways to make the symptoms more manageable for my husband and me.  I have tried many things but the most effective approach, I have found, is to have savings.  I don’t have much in the way of savings at any one time but the money we have kept by has certainly helped me through the more serious bouts of the illness. 

My current spending obsession - this smells amazing! Have bought two bottles of the shower gel since our spa trip!

Joking aside, I do sometimes feel as though I am cursed with an illness called the wanties.   An ex of mine always called me a ‘marketeer’s dream’.  He was so right.  I am a sucker for marketing tricks; nice styling and special offers having me reaching for my wallet every time.  I have always read lots of magazines which add fuel to the fire but now I’ve discovered blogging I am even worse.  No wonder so many ad agencies have cottoned on to the power of the blogger’s review; the rapport between bloggers can be very strong and a review by someone whose opinions you have come to trust can be very powerful indeed.  If the lovely Vanessa, for example, recommends a book it’s in my Amazon basket quicker than you can say ‘crochet’.  If Lucy shares the gorgeous colourful photos of her Spring bulbs, my supermarket shop is a teeny bit more expensive that week as hyacinths and daffodils sneak their way into the trolley.  
I used to think that credit cards were the way to deal with the wanties.  Stick everything on the credit card and worry later.  Instant gratification.  Then I married a bank manager who frowned upon my frivolous spending.  (I caved; it’s a sexy frown let me tell you.)  Now I have ‘pocket money’ each week and if I don’t spend it, I save it.  The money goes into my savings account and enables me to have a proper splurge when the wanties hit hard.  It is amazing how easy it is for me to control the wanties when I know that I have the means to make a guilt-free purchase.  Savings are so precious to me that I think twice, often thrice, before hitting the ‘confirm order’ button.  This makes me happy - I feel liberated and in control - when I buy something that I’ve thought long and hard about, I am even more grateful for it.  Andrew’s happy, too.  No more cheery announcements of "baked beans for dinner all week I’m afraid, darling, but I do have the most gorgeous handbag you’re going to just LOVE". 

My new and beloved De Manta clutch bag.  Paid for with the pocket money I saved.  Yay me! 

Hope everyone is having a good week!  So glad it's nearly the weekend, I've got loads planned including a bit of shopping at a local vintage fair and afternoon tea with my oldest friend before she gets married on Monday.    

Thanks for popping by - I need to catch up on loads of blogs this weekend as I feel a bit out of touch.  With these gorgeously sunny evenings I just have to be outside!  :-)  

Nicki 
x

19 comments:

  1. I share your illness! Well done for easing the symptoms with savings x x

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  2. Ooooh. Nice toiletres love! I can almost smell them from here.
    Let me tell you that before children, I used to spend my hour's lunch break walking around Bath city centre and spending my salary before I got paid. I bought everything under the sun and loved it.
    Then I had children and didn't work full time anymore. And they needed more things than me. My money went on them and it didn't go far. And I kind of got into it.
    I can't believe I am the same person now. I try to go days without spending a penny - not to be tight, just an experiment to see if I can. And material items just don't excitement me like they used to - I only have three bags, I wouldn't even call them handbags. Handbags are fancier than what I own. One was £2.50 from a charity shop, one was £5 in Accessorize sale after Christmas and one was £2 in Matalan. That is it. I see other bags, I see other expensive bags but I look at the price tag and can't bring myself to do it. I would panic if I had expensive things, I wouldn't want to take them out of the house.
    It then takes hold. Perhaps in the opposite way of you having the wanties.
    90 per cent of my wardrobe is charity as you probably know, and I get a kick of spending very little.
    I get to the end of the day and I look at my purchases and realise that by asking myself "did I really need that?" most of my would-be purchases didn't even make it past the till.
    What I am trying to say is that what you are doing is a good way of seeing whether you REALLY need it. Saving up pocket money! You are like the Princess, she does that too. But she only ever saves enough to buy Moshi Monsters magazines!!!
    Have a lush time with your friend, it sounds lush, afternoon tea and vintage fair. What's not to like.
    I am off for a bath now. In my Lidl bubble bath. I kid you not. I used to spend a small fortune on bath things!!!!
    x x x x

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  3. OMG...at my above post. TOO LONG. Sorry. Was just trying to support you in your plight for not actually needing everything you want! And then you eventually don't even want it! x x

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  4. Fab symptom management ;) xo

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  5. I have the wanties a lot! I love to buy my little boy lots of clothes and toys and it is getting a bit out of control. Ooops.
    Lovely bag!
    Dx

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  6. Ooh Nicki I share your illness too, sometimes I suffer quite badly, and am totally like you - if I see something gorgeous on someone's beautiful blog or they recommend something, I've just got to have it. To cure my illness I sell on eBay then I can usually justify buying something to replace it :) loving your blog by the way
    Victoria xx

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  7. I don't know about you but I'm now finding that you can also catch the wanties from Instagram!! No one warned me...

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  8. Im glad this illness has been named,I always just called it "my list" ha ha! I think every girl out there has the wanties!!
    have a great weekend!

    Shirley x

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  9. Oh my I get the wanties so much, but being the bread winner in this house of 3 and paying rent, I really have learnt to do without.....(but show me a sale and I am there)I went clothes shopping yesterday and bought a lot of my winter clothes on sale, happy girl. I found a pair of boots that were more than half price online, had to have them for winter only $41 can't go past that.
    xx Sandi

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  10. I think it means more when you've had to save up for something you've wanted for ages,rather than just being able to go out and buy whatever you want,whenever you want it.I have the serious wanties for a whole new Summer wardrobe,now that I've lost 2 stone! :0)

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  11. I think most of us are affected by the 'wanties'. I stopped buying magazines a year ago to get out of the habit of wanting all lovely things I saw. I guess blogging is like a magazine too. Probably worse in fact. If someone does love or recommend something on their blog, they do so because they genuinely love it, not because they are being paid to sell it others. Women on blogs tell things like it is, and that's good. I'd far more believe a blogger about a product than an advert. Good for you though with saving for something that you really want. By doing that it stops the impulse buying and makes you think as to whether you really do want it.

    My eldest boys are at an age where they have to start saving up to buy their own things. They both saved up £180 to buy their ipod touch's and because of that, they don't want to take them out of the house and really look after them. The biggest one is now saving up for his own laptop!

    Have a beautiful day Nicki, hope the sun is shining for you!

    Vanessa xxxxx

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  12. Oh I suffer as well,I dont know any men that suffer so it must be a girl thing.I have a need for smellies,baskets,books and linen my hubby would say and a lot of other things but they are the ones I admit to.Have a good weekend love Jill xx

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  13. Humongous congrats to you on having savings, as a fellow wanties sufferer and soon-to-be-ex credit card abuser I applaud you!

    My younger sister is definitely not a sufferer, which is good as she now sorts my finances out for me!

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  14. I too suffer the wanties badly but am trying to cure it! I often pick things up, hold on to them walk about the shop then decide nope I really don't need it and put it back. And you are quite right that reading blogs makes you reach out for your credit card and click here and there on links and before you know it you appear to have ordered another item online! Since joining the instagram world my oh my that really is testing the wanties to the limit lol
    Have a great weekend!
    Ali
    x

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  15. Oh my, love that line about the baked beans and handbag ha! Did your husband ever love the handbags?
    Absolutely love that you get pocket money. I wish I still got it, it actually does make you control your money more. I used to live on £20 a month, and have about £5 left over at the end. What did I do with my life? I must have been a hermit.
    But no, I can definitely agree with you about having the wanties (I never actually knew what it was called - but I like this name). But because I rarely have money, I never really buy the stuff, and when I go back a few weeks later and look at the stuff I always sigh in relief and think "oh thank God, what was I thinking?", I think it's just the urge of spending my money, I don't really care for what I buy! Thankfully I'm not as bad as my mum, you want to see all the cr*p she comes home with after shopping at TK Maxx. And over half the stuff is in the shed now. Typical.
    Hope you've been enjoying the sun and had a nice week:) xxx

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  16. Wanties ... the blogger's curse! Thank goodness for pocket money ... which begs the question, why don't I get any!?! Happy saving and spending Nicki a

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  17. Don't fret about it doll! You're in really good company. Anyway it is an evolutionary quirk. if we didn't want the the good stuff, if we didn't hanker for things we haven't got or envy our neighbours their nicer homes etc... we would never have moved on from caves and bonfires. As cavemen we were always looking for better shelter; warmer, dryer, safer. It is so part of our genetic make up that we cannot stop trying to improve our surroundings and that includes our clothes.

    Money is involved is because that is the society we live in. You can't just go and fight with your neighbour and nick their cave, you have to buy it. Whether its 50p from a charity shop or £500 from Net-a-Porter. It's all relative, we have to buy what we want and sometimes we have to save.

    I love nice things, I don't care what they cost or where they are from, I just love special stuff. I don't want to give out a sob story because my childhood was great, but I had very very little. I didn't even have brothers or sisters because my parents couldn't afford another child!!! Trouble is, I seem to be naturally drawn to the expensive stuff, ha! Lord knows what that says about me!

    But you know what, I don't think your illness is life (style) threatening because you take as much pleasure from a handpicked posy of wild flowers as you do from Marc Jacobs.

    So you carry on saving and so will I and we will go to a spa!

    xxx

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  18. ps. My husband has this illness badly. It is what drives him to work so hard. But you know, this is no bad thing, he employs a permanent team of 25 and sub contracts out to 200 more. If he didn't have the wanties he wouldn't do what he does and those people wouldn't have jobs.

    xxx

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  19. Oh yes, I have the same illness, I think there's a lot of us in the same boat :D I have never had huge amounts of money to spend on frivilous things, but I do like to buy myself small little treats every now and again. I'm not into designer labels or fashion but I do like to get little homey things and they do make me happy so I think they are justified! Actually, I never count any of my fabric, buttons, yarn stuff as 'treats' as I count them as 'work' purchases! But technically they are really both :)

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